How to Use Emmers Books to Build Emotional Skills

By Melanie Palmer

How to Use Emmers Books to Build Emotional Skills

The Emmers "Big-Hearted Resilience Series" books aren’t meant to be read once and put back on the shelf.

They’re designed to be returned to again and again - especially during the moments when kids are navigating frustration, disappointment, or something that just feels hard.

If your child shuts down, melts down, or gets stuck in the same hard moments again and again, stories can help in ways conversations sometimes can’t. If you’re looking for the full set, you can find the Big-Hearted Resilience Book Set here.

This guide walks through how to use the Emmers books in a way that builds real emotional skills, without turning storytime into a lesson or a lecture. If you’re new here, start with Welcome to Raising Big-Hearted, Resilient Kids for all our free resources.

Start With the Story (Not the Teaching)

On the first read, your only job is to enjoy the story.

Let your child react however they want. Laugh. Interrupt. Skip pages. Find the hidden creature on each page. Ask questions that don’t have answers.

Resist the urge to explain the emotion, correct their interpretation, or point out the “lesson.” The story itself is already doing that work.

Emotional learning sticks best when kids feel relaxed and connected - not evaluated.

Read the Book That Matches What Your Child Is Living

One of the most powerful ways to use Emmers books is to match the story to what’s happening in real life.

For example:

  • A child who keeps losing and wants to give up
  • Plans that don’t go the way your child hoped
  • Struggling with something that feels harder for them than for others

When kids recognize themselves in a character, they don’t feel singled out. They feel understood.

Often, you don’t need to say anything at all. The story creates the emotional distance kids need to reflect safely.

Use the Second (and Third) Read Differently

Repeated reading is where emotional skills deepen. On later reads, you might:

  • Pause and ask, “What do you think they’re feeling here?”
  • Wonder out loud, “What do you think they might try next?”
  • Ask, “Has anything like this ever happened to you?”

There’s no need to ask every question, every time. Even one gentle prompt helps kids practice noticing emotions and thinking through responses.

Let Kids Lead the Conversation

If your child wants to focus on a small detail, a picture, or one repeated moment in the story, follow their lead.

Kids often return to the same book because they’re still working through the same feeling. Repetition isn’t boredom - t’s practice.

Your role isn’t to move them forward. It’s to stay with them.

What to Say (and What Not to Say)

Helpful language sounds like:

  • “That looks really frustrating.”
  • “I wonder what they’re thinking right now.”
  • “It makes sense they’d feel that way.” 

If you want one simple line to use during tough moments, try one question that helps kids through big feelings.

Try to avoid:

  • Fixing the problem
  • Rushing to reassurance
  • Explaining how the character should feel

When kids feel understood, their nervous systems settle - and that’s when the best learning happens.

Why Re-Reading Matters

Kids don’t read the same Emmers book over and over because they didn’t understand it. They reread because they’re building a skill.

Each time, they’re:

  • noticing emotions more clearly
  • understanding cause and effect
  • building confidence that hard moments can change

That’s emotional resilience in action.

Pair Books With Play for Even Deeper Learning

Reading an Emmers book and then playing the Emotion Seekers game later helps kids connect the story to their own experiences. Stories create understanding. Play creates practice. Together, they help kids move from “I see it” to “I can do it.” Here are our favorite ways to use it: how to get the most out of the Emotion Seekers game.

Final Thought

Emmers books aren’t about raising kids who never struggle.

They’re about helping kids feel seen in their struggles - and supported as they learn how to move through them.

You don’t need to read perfectly or say the right thing.

Just showing up, again and again, is what builds emotional growth.

Have questions? We love hearing from you! Reach out to support@emmersco.com

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